Clean up, aisle 3

I had a hard time adjusting to having two kids. Not because she was a girl or because it meant twice as many diapers to change or even because that meant we would have to buy another set of baby accoutrement since Abigail was still young enough to need her crib, dresser, etc. No, I had a hard time adjusting because every time I held her she would barf on me. That's not an exaggeration. Ask around. My friends will vouch for me. Suzi would feed her and even hold her upright for a while before handing her to me, but as soon as I got Elise, she'd yack all over me. I got tired of smelling like sour milk so I even went a little while without even holding her. I'd play with her and talk to her while someone else was holding her. It's not like I wear cologne or deodorant that would irritate her gag reflux. I don't usually wear cologne and my deodorant is unscented because I don't even like the smell of most deodorants. Suzi holding her - fine. Me holding her - vomit fountain. Anyway, she grew out of it and every now and then while I'm cuddling with her I whisper in her ear, "Thank you for not puking on me in a long time." She tells me I'm welcome and smiles up at me. Sweet moment.

Then she goes and does something like this:

It was time to brush the dogs. I sat on the floor and was giving Nanuk a good brushing. He was enjoying all the attention as I brushed and the girls talked to him. It took a while since he has so much thick fur and I was trying to do a really good job. I don't know how long we were sitting on the floor, but it must have been longer than a little girl bladder can hold its water. Did I mention the girls had their diapers off due to an ongoing potty training seminar? All of the sudden I see Elise take a step toward me and I felt her touching my leg. "That's sweet," I thought. "She's happy and wants to touch me." Then I felt something that sort of felt warm and wet at the same time. That was odd. I looked at what could be making me feel that sensation and then I saw it. She's not touching me; she's peeing on me. I was in such shock that I didn't know what to do but to sit in shock for a second longer. Then Elise had the audacity to start to turn to walk away when she was done as if to say, "Ok. Thanks. Now I feel better." At least she doesn't hurl on me anymore.